Dependency and Desperation
Do you consider yourself to be a dependent person? Is the word dependency a bad word? It brings to mind two people in an unhealthy relationship, or maybe it makes you think about substance abuse. I think we are raised to be fiercely independent, especially in this country. We guard our image of self-sufficiency. We display the fact that we have much to offer others but don’t need anything from anyone.
The word dependency does deserve some of the negative connotations that come attached to it. I have experienced firsthand the devastation of being dependent on relationships. I have clung to romances that were not what God intended for me. I shudder to think how close I once came to dependency on substances.
The destructive nature of substance abuse and dependency is so very real. I have been surrounded by this sad truth in my work with the homeless population of Washington, DC. I have so often witnessed the friends that I’ve made on the streets dealing with damaging dependencies. I have carried on many conversations with those I love on D Street that are incomprehensible. Women have prayed for me who could hardly finish their sentences. I've had someone greet me with a familiar hug and turn around seconds later to finish a drug deal.
I know we live in a broken world, but could it be possible that dependency is something God intended for us? I believe we were all meant to be deeply, utterly, and desperately, dependent…on the One that wants more for us then we could ever want for ourselves. We should all explore our tendencies toward dependencies and ask honestly, “What am I dependent on?” We can only hope the answer is our Abba Father. For those that find they are dependent on anything else, there is hope. And if we find in this exploration that we do not feel any great desperation or urgency in our lives then may we move closer to seeing just how great our need is for Christ.
Psalm 62:5-8: “I depend on God alone; I put my hope in Him. He alone protects and saves me; He is my defender, and I shall never be defeated. My salvation and honor depend on God; He is my strong protector; He is my shelter. Trust in God at all times, my people. Tell him all your troubles, for He is our refuge.”
Jesus experienced this great need for the Father. He was absolutely and completely dependent on God. He did nothing apart from the Father. In John 5:19 Jesus explained, “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does.”
Christ’s every thought and action was concerned with the Father. Every beat of His heart was meant to be pleasing to God. His loving and compassionate service was to glorify the eternal king. Every word Jesus spoke was meant to point people to the source of all goodness.
We can only hope and pray for such dependency and desperation. Let’s plunge ourselves into a dependency on a constant God, that never changes. He is trustworthy. He is worthy.
Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us to “[t]rust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
And what about being dependent on one another? I believe we should humble ourselves and admit that we need a healthy spirit filled community to carry us through our hardships, which will come. We need a community that will show us the face of God and spur on our faith when our fire wanes. We need a community that will lovingly and boldly tell us when we are hurting ourselves or others. Being honest about our limitations and accepting gifts of love and service lifts others above us. Being honest about our limitations lifts God above us.
Let us not hesitate to show our vulnerability and need. Let’s display our weaknesses and confidently say I can’t do anything aside from God. This is what I want for my life. I want truth. I want to cling to what I was created to grasp for. I want peace and surrender as I lay all I am and all I need at the Father’s feet. I want to be known for what I am, powerless. I want to know Him for what He is, empowering.
Merciful Father, your ways are best. I pray that your Holy Spirit empowers me to grow in my dependency and desperation on you and your kingdom. I know I can do nothing aside from you. Let this truth humble me and gently draw me back to you again and again for all my needs.
